I love reminiscing. There are sweet memories in it.
I hate reminiscing. The memories hurt.
Because i am an idiot.
I assumed things, and acted on my own accord. But there are precious treasures in my possession that i could not give away nor throw away when i thought how much a waste it would be. Everything that had been done were unrequited, since it was not requested. I didn't expect all the blame would ultimately fall upon my own self.
I was once told and believed that striving for one's best does not hurt anybody. But i was wrong. People we care might get hurt along the way no matter what we do, but still in the end we will end up hurting ourselves. If that is so why strive for one's best if the end only brings no good?
There are entities called hopes and dreams. If we lived to aim for something, even it might not work out well, at least it's gratifying. It is not the goal or destination that makes a difference, it is the process. Throughout the process we learn, we hurt, we understand. Experiences stays forever, but possessions does not. The same goes for people.
It doesn't matter if what we do does not reach the one we aim for, because what matters is their happiness, not ours. If we think what we do is for the happiness of someone else, then it will not matter if it really works out or not.
I wonder, when will we grow up and learn to understand the depths of knowledge. Then we can and will only see the good in every single thing. When, i wonder...